Not Today
by iambrittybear
Summary: Slightly Spoilerish. My take on episode 2x10. Is it time to say good-bye to Casey? Mainly from Dawson's point of view. Dawson x Casey and Shay x Dawson and Shay x Severide


_Authors Note: It's been a really long time since I've written fanfic. I used to write all the time, my old username was xxangelxx911. Unfortunately, I have no idea what the login information is for that any longer. Haha. Yeah, it's been awhile. Anyways, I just recently started watching Chicago Fire and I absolutely love it! I saw the previews for next week, so this is a little spoilerish. Basically, the previews made me nervous so I've decided to take what they've given us and put my own spin on it. Let me know what you think._

_**Not Today**_

***One-Shot***

It's said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That in the blink of an eye everything can change; good or bad. December 10th, 2013 had started out as any other Tuesday. But it wouldn't end that way.

Twenty-Six Hours. How had everything changed in 26 hours? Twenty-Six hours ago it was just before 8am and the whole crew filed into the house ready to start their shift. Mouch and Herrmann were arguing over something futile, Severide was joking with Shay, Clark was explaining to Mills how he rebuilt the engine of an old mustang, and me? Well I finally had the man of my dreams. Even if no one else really knew yet other than us. It was perfect; in every sense of the word.

Then it started. The chief met us as we entered the garage. We were informed that this was our last shift and house 51 would be closing. We were all devastated, sure, but we just wanted to enjoy our final shift together. It was pretty quiet for an hour, then everyone started to adjust to the news.

The sirens rang out around 2 pm informing us that there was a 3 alarm fire; we were all summoned. It was just a normal call; we'd save some lives, fight a fire or two, rescue a trapped victim, and be back at the house in time for dinner. Not today.

The events replayed themselves over and over again in my head, like a bad dream I couldn't wake up from.

"_Casey, Cruz, do you copy? That house is about to blow! Get out now!" Chief demanded into his radio_

_Matt didn't respond and as every second passed, my heart raced more._

"_I'll go find them" Severide offered_

_Chief Boden didn't respond._

"_I can find them" Severide insisted_

_Chief shook his head "No one goes back into that house, Kelly"_

_Then we heard it. Cruz screamed Matt's name. Smoked spilled out of the house and Cruz emerged, the baby they were searching for in his arms. Shay took the small child from Cruz's arms on the doorstep and before another word was uttered disappeared back into the house. A few seconds later, he emerged practically carrying Matt in his arms. Shay reacted immediately, but I was frozen. All I saw was his limp body and the blood. _

Everything else is really a blur. Now, I'm sitting in the empty chapel at the hospital, praying. I'm not even religious. Why would the man upstairs even listen to me? I felt her hand on my shoulder and glanced over at her. The blonde that I'd spent the last few weeks not speaking to hadn't left my side.

"The crew's back" she hesitated "They're asking for you"

"Any news?" I wondered

She shook her head slowly "Nothing yet, but you know the old saying, no news is good news"

I shuttered "He practically died in my arms, Shay"

Shay took a deep breath and walked around the pew, sitting next to me. She turned towards me and took my hands into hers "But he didn't, try to hang on to that"

My lip quivered as tears streamed down my face "I just got him, you know. Everything was finally how it was supposed to be"

Shay released her grip on my hand and propped my chin up "He's fighting right now Dawson, he needs you to keep fighting too! Don't give up on him!"

Otis appeared in the doorway, his drawn features evident. Shay glanced over my shoulder towards him.

"The doctor is coming out in a minute" he informed us

Shay nodded as I squeezed my eyes tightly. Shay leaned into me, kissing my forehead "It's going to be okay baby girl, he's got this"

She stood up, pulling me up with her and wrapping her arm around my shoulders as she lead us back towards the waiting room.

As we rounded the corner, everyone else came into view. Everyone look towards us. Chief Boden stood to meet me.

He reached out to my shoulder, squeezing it slightly and nodding confidently.

I glanced over Chief's shoulder, spotting the doctor walking down the hallway toward us. I stepped around Chief and went to the doctor.

"How is he?" I asked

The doctor took a deep breath "He's alive and right now, he's lucky to be that"

I chewed on my lip nervously "So what now?"

"He has multiple contusions to the head as you know and there is some brain swelling which we'll have to monitor" the doctor paused "When that beam fell, it punctured his lung and there was some internal bleeding. We were able to find the bleed and get that taken care of"

I nodded slowly "Is he going to be okay?"

The doctor sighed " I can't answer that. That young man's body has been pushed to it's limits, we have to wait and see. The next 24 hours are critical"

Shay appeared next to her best friend "Thank you doctor"

"Can I see him?" I asked

"Are you family? His wife?" the doctor inquired

"I'm his girlfriend, is that not enough for you?" I spit angrily, instantly regretting my hateful tone.

He nodded "When he wakes up, he's going to be very groggy. He's on a lot of medicine, don't push him too hard. He's got a tall hill to climb"

I glared, feeling my anger resurface again "You mean we can't go out and train for a marathon tomorrow?"

I pushed Shay's arm away slightly and headed down the hall.

Shay sighed "I'm sorry doctor"

He smiled slightly "It's okay, I totally understand"

She nodded as he turned and disappeared around a corner. She watched Gabby make her way down the hallway. Severide stood from his chair.

"When did that happen?" he wondered

Mouch murmured "It was only a matter of time"

Shay crossed her arms over her chest "Can we not debate Dawson and Casey's relationship right now? He's fighting for his life and Dawson is so damn scared she's got one foot already in the grave for him"

Severide walked over to her, his hand reaching out and cupping her cheek "I know you're trying to be strong for Gabby right now, but you don't have to be strong for me. I know you're scared baby, I'm scared too, we're all scared. A member of our family is fighting for his life right now and were powerless to help"

Shay closed her eyes, tears sneaking out from her closed eyelids "Kelly"

Her desperate tone broke his heart. He pulled her firmly against his body. His arm wrapping around her small frame, tracing lines up and down her back comfortingly.

"Matt's going to be okay, Shay" he breathed into her ear "Nothing else is acceptable"

The cold glass against my hand sent shivers through my whole body. I could barely see through the curtains, but I was terrified to enter that room. Afraid of what I'd see, afraid of my thoughts going to a dark place. I took a deep breath and pushed myself off the window. I took the short steps to the door and entered through it. I slowly pushed through the curtains.

My sharp intake of breath hurt my chest. There were so many machines and wires. His perfect face was so pale and bruised. I saw things like this on a daily basis, 99% of the time way worse. But this was the man I loved. I licked my lips and pushed further into the room. I closed the distance between his bed and myself. I reached for his hand, careful not to interfere with the IV. I slid my hand under, cupping his hand in mine. I'd never felt his hands so cold. Everything hit me then. If anything happened to him; I felt my knees give out. I fell slightly against the bed and slid to my knees. I fought back my tears and swallowed the sobs in my throat. I couldn't go to that dark place again. I just couldn't.

I held his hand in mine, kissing the tips of his fingers "I'm here Matt, we're all here"

My voice was betraying me and my sobs couldn't be swallowed any longer. They were starting to choke me.

"You have to fight Matt" I whispered "You're my world, my whole world. You're my future, you're my everything"

My sobs were racking my body now and I couldn't even begin to control them.

"Please" I begged "Baby, please, just stay with me"

I bowed my head against his hand on his bed and cried. I didn't know what else to do and I couldn't control the fear in the pit of my stomach.

"Gabby, I love you" I heard him say

I didn't even pick my head up, I knew it wasn't real. I was so emotional, I was imagining things. Then his fingers moved and I slowly pushed my head up. His beautiful eyes were exhausted, but they were staring so intensely at me. He had tears in his eyes. Here he was fighting for his life and he was worried about me.

"Matt" I breathed

He tried to smile, but ended up whimpering slightly in pain.

"You didn't think you'd get rid of my that easily, did you?" he whispered

I smiled through my tears "I love you so much"

He licked his lips "No more tears baby, I'll be out of here in no time"

I pushed myself up off the floor "Promise me you'll never leave"

He smiled this time. It wasn't much, but it was a smile "Never ever"

I squeezed the palm of his hand, my other hand going to his forehead and brushing over his bruises and bandages tenderly "You need to rest"

"Come here" he breathed

"Matt" I protested

"Come here" he stated as firmly as possible "That's an order Dawson"

I grinned, leaning into him "Yes, Lieutenant"

He picked his head up off his pillow, his lips brushing softly against mine before pulling back and resting his head back on the pillow.

"You're my forever too" he whispered

My heart soared as he gave me another slight smile and then his eyes closed tiredly. I let go of his hand briefly, crossing the room and grabbing a chair. I slid it over to the side of his bed as close as I could. I sat down and slid my hand back under his. I watched his chest rise and fall slowly listening to his breathing pattern.

I had no idea what was going to happen next. I didn't know if I had a job, where I'd be working, who I'd be working with, or anything really. But I knew Matt was going to be okay. He was going to pull through and together we'd figure the rest out. Right now, that was all I needed. He was all I needed.

Thanks for reading!

- Britt


End file.
